Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Way of a Lady: Rule Eight

A Lady is of Good Repute.
She is honored by her company.

It says that "A good name is above rubies." It is certain that anyone enjoys a good name when they realize they have one. But we need to consider why it is essential in the recognition of being a Lady. C. S. Lewis describes a certain woman thusly, "She was the kind of woman that lived for others. You could tell the others by their hunted expression." There are many do-gooder, busy-body woman who will tell you themsleves the service they are to their society. Reputation is the reality. Reputation is the collection of a Lady's successes. A Lady's gift is to others and the memories of those gifts are there, in the others, reposed. If she has succeeded in maintaining the expectations presumed to be a Lady defined, society will thus define her. Certainly she should not be seeking to hear the flattery or fish for those compliments. While she might truly want to know how she is doing, an opposite message will be sent. A direct compliment fished for is doubtful at best. The encouragement of society's praise does, with time, seep back to the cause and if it is trustworthy, a Lady will be able to confidently pursue and perhaps adjust her efforts. While a Lady will hear, inadvertently, praise of her deeds, this quality of definition is largely for the rest of society. It helps identify those whose behavior, in light of this informal honor, should be elevated in more minds than those directly benefited by her. It also points a young lady seeking guidance in these skills to know whom to trust. Valuation by society is a training for a society. What is valued will be that to which other women wish to rise.

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